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Eli
Eli Bacon is a pig farmer who has discovered how to make bacon, a revolutionary type of meat made from pigs. Before the discovery, Eli and Martin the Master Gardener were the only people still keeping pigs - the latter only because his prized behemoth pig, Pigzilla, would attract many visitors from far and wide. Eli only had some "wrestling pigs", being from a family of famous pig wrestlers. While preparing one of them, Gassy Steve, for a competition, he accidentally set it on fire and the smell of Steve cooking attracted many people. They begged Eli not to bury Steve, but to have them taste him. The sad farmer obeyed and discovered the pork was delicious. He named it after himself, "bacon", and got the rights for the meat from the Cooks' Guild. However, it seems that something might have gone wrong here, for Eli claims to have made a deal with "Chef Morrisane" from the guild, when the guild has no such employee; a much likelier explanation is that the shady businessman Ali Morrisane managed to make yet another deal with huge profits for him. In the meantime, the extreme popularity of the bacon accidentally caused people who have tasted it to become dependent on it. This resulted in a group of bacon addicts mindlessly storming Eli's farm after he had them taste some, and attempting to eat his pigs. However, the group of bacon addicts would keep returning, threatening the pigs to extinction. As such, Eli hired an adventurer to aid him in first advertising the use of pigs around the world so that people would breed them, and then introducing bacon to them. This went successful, aside from one interruption where the addicts stormed the farm again. Eli had the adventurer drug them with a "sleeping potion" (really poison P++++), and the addicts completely disappeared a short while later; it is implied that Eli disposed of their bodies by feeding them to the Pigzilla piglet. Such practices are speculated not to be uncommon for Eli, as it is constantly suggested that he has murdered people. It's hinted that he often assaults hikers near the farm (having once broken a hammer on one), buries the bodies of people he has killed and their belongings on his farm, while apparently feeding others to his pigs. It is has even been suggested that the disturbingly man-like scarecrows in the cabbage patch wear victims' clothes. This has lead to several occasions where he was questioned by local authorities, but he has always denied the claims. If a pig pet is lost, it can be reclaimed from Eli in his cellar. Additionally, he can be spoken to after Bringing Home the Bacon to receive a weekly dose of raw bacon or pouches for the pig Summoning familiars. Players are advised to claim the familiar reward as raw bacon has very little practical purpose and sells poorly on the Grand Exchange while the respective familiars can provide more use, especially the Spirit prayer pig which is one of the few familiars that restore Prayer points. Trivia *In southeast and northwest corners of Storm Cellar, several crates full of bones may be found which, when examined, say "there is probably nothing wrong with this" and "this is perfectly normal farming equipment". *Eli backs up the seemingly strange decision to name the meat he discovered after himself by stating that beer was invented by Gerald Beer, bread by Simon Bread and Cooked meat by Richard Cookedmeat, although this is unlikely. *It is speculated that the character "Eli Bacon" is a parody of Robert William Pickton and the notorious pig farm serial murders. Stark similarities between the two are discovered by further exploring dialogue options with Eli during the "Bringing Home the Bacon" quest. References Category:Repeatable events